Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Whenever I see a gay couple...

I try to figure out which one is the guy. Females, or males- doesn't matter. There's always a guy & a chick in the couple.

Worked with this woman, she'd been married (to a man), had kids, then came out. Her partner brought coworker's dog to work one day & they all came in to show it off. She walked slightly in front of the partner, holding the dog & grinning, the partner had her hands in her pockets & was sauntering behind looking indulgent. Partner was the guy.

Spouse & I went to a bar to hear Muddy Waters play. Table next to us had a guy gay couple. The partner facing me didn't smile or show much expression. The other partner, side profile to me, seemed a little anxious, leaning over frequently to ask or comment about something, fussing with his chair a bit, smiling in response to the music. Facing partner seemed almost a little irritated with the fidgeting & chatter. Facing was the guy.

These are just a couple of my informal observations, but I almost wonder if there isn't something to them. If gayness is (as they would have us believe) as biologically, spiritually, evolutionarily, and physiologically normal as heterosexuality, then why does one partner have a male partner role and one a female role?

Gay guy couple on the adoption show on Discovery Health. One was older, graying, chatty. The other was younger, less talkative. The older one held the baby in most of the scenes, the younger mentioned how uncomfortable he was with diapers. The older fussed over the baby, cuddled it, seemed to be the mom figure for the baby. Younger seemed to be the somewhat-standoffish-with-infants dad figure. Why?

Do gays want nothing less than full-frontal-white-wedding-married-filing-jointly status in part because they are able to mimic the typical roles in a hetero marriage?

How much of the role differences is just role playing? I mean, is it a social & societal norm for any theoretically permanent pair to have one partner fulfill one biological, sexual role and the other partner fulfill the other role whether the pair is homo or hetero? Or is it that a person who is 'born gay' is also born into some predetermined, biological, pseudo-sexual role? Are some gay babies (if such a thing exists) predetermined to be the guy & some the girl?

And if there is such a thing- if gays are born with predetermined social-sexual roles, then where does the biology of procreation apply? What would be the biological point of homosexuality if there is no corresponding opposite sex partner to complete the procreation equation?

What in all of this makes gays want nothing less than full-on-call-the-caterer-dance-with-daddy white weddings? Why can't they just get their civil unions, their tax breaks, their legal rights and be done with it? Why must they constantly be in my face about this crap?

Gays are a pain in the ass.

No pun intended.


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