Thursday, May 26, 2005

I've done number 54.

Recently Chris at Dangerous Logic recommended that I read Right-Thinking Girl, as she reportedly tells a great story. I happened over there today & found her list of 100 things she wants to do before she dies.

As I've stated, I've done #54 and I'd pay to do #84. #87, for me, would be running.

Maybe I'll make a list like that someday. Mine would probably only be 7 things or so. I can't dream that far out. Too many variables.

More time for blogging.

No go on the school board thing. I'm not brokenhearted about it. It's easier to bitch about people when you're not actually working with them.

Friday, May 20, 2005

Why not Hilary?

A while back I posted about a bizarre encounter I had in one of my classes regarding the possibility of Hilary Clinton as this country's first female president. A couple of really funny recent posts I've read speak to that same subject.

Wicked Thoughts shares a joke about what she might do to get there (mean & funny!) here.

A Red Mind... shares a joke about why it won't happen either way (do not have liquid in your mouth funny) here.

Woman president in my lifetime? Not going to happen.
Hilary as that woman? So not going to happen.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

It's like we were separated at [a] birth...

...that's how it has felt for me a couple of times recently reading Italian American Princess. Today's, I mean yesterday's post took me straight back to my own wedding & dealing with my own insane cousins, who cornered me at another cousin's wedding about a month before mine to find out where the hell their invitations were.

First, some background. I am black. Most of my family is also black, extended as well. Those who are not are actually light-skinned blacks.

Spouse is white. Most of his family is also white, extended as well. Those who are not are adopted from Korea.

Some of spouse's family includes some who practice what I refer to as 'institutional racism.' They don't necessarily understand, nor are they able to effectively articulate why they hate blacks, they just do because that's the way everybody felt in rural shitville or wherever they grew up.

Some of my family engages in what I'll term 'occupational racism.' They hate Whitey because, they claim, Whitey keeps them down. It is not through their own effort, or lack thereof, that they are not wealthy and successful (by whatever standards they use to define success), it is because white men never have and never will give them or anyone else who is not an uncle tom a fair shake.

I think the only reason they wanted to come to my wedding was to see if spouse would be wearing blackface. I am ashamed to admit that I wimped out. I actually apologized (my mother raised me right, and I'm almost always polite in person), and wrote down their addresses so it looked like it was some incredible oversight, and just prayed silently that they wouldn't be able to find a ride.

Well, they found a ride. In fact, their ride was two or three people who stayed, thus overcrowding my intimate outdoor wedding, and who I didn't even know. Whatever. The important thing is that everybody ended up behaving well & was polite despite the opportunity for a possible race war to break out in a semi-rural county where I'm pretty sure the sheriff's deputies would have arrived with the shotguns locked & loaded once they were aware of part of the crowd they'd be dealing with. Not just city folk, but colored city folk.

Anyway. The insane mom angle also covered by Italian... Princess crystallized for me later on well after the wedding, when I was newly pregnant with our first daughter (a quite beautiful tea-with-milk tinted child, if I might say so). I was talking to her by phone early on & I was pretty happy. She was too, then she laid this on me: "Oh, this is so wonderful. It's too bad he's not black."

There was silence on the line for several seconds until I said (racist? yeah. realist? shit yeah.) "No, mom, because then I'd still be pregnant & he'd be gone." As is the case with those cousins I referred to earlier. All mothers of beautiful chocolate brown fatherless children.

I just voted for Italian American Princess in The Blogette Award contest. You should too, soon, because it really is a shame that right now she's ranked below crap like why-this-one-woman-hates-her-husband. (Maybe he smokes so much pot because you're a harping belittling bitch).

You can vote for my girl here.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

She got a heart as big as the whole outdoors...

but she ain't got a brain in her whole head.

At least that's what the withering but somehow loving look spouse gave me last evening seemed to say after this exchange:

We caught a few minutes of "The Horse Whisperer." (Only a few because spouse's respirations began to decrease just a few seconds after I turned to it). I asked him what state that was, Montana? He started to say something in response but I interrupted with "no, that can't be, there are mountains in the distance."

He said, slowly, with his eyes narrowed, "Yeeeaaahhh. There are mountains in Montana..."

Honestly? I had no idea.

Well, what do you know? Absolutely beautiful photo of a mountain vista in Montana right here.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Doesn't matter if I win or lose...

...because I'm number 1 either way.

Corroborative evidence.

We got this from a source who's usually very reliable.

So what? So you didn't bother to corroborate the story? To check the alleged facts?

Rob at Roborant had something to say on this, as did Tony at A Red Mind. (I only checked with those two, I am certain that many around the larger blog world were as disgusted with the whole sorry mess Newsweek started as I).

I hope this does not become a matter of "any publicity..." I'd like to see Newsweek (which I always thought pretty much sucked) lose some advertisers. They never really had to worry about losing me as a reader. When I've had to chose between Fly Fishing Monthly & Newsweek in the waiting room, I've checked out the ads for hip waders.

So, how is the school board race going?

Don't know yet. Things are going okay, and we're in the voting period (it lasts several days), and several people have told me they either have or plan to vote for me, but then I suspect several people told carrie the same thing so who knows.

It's interesting, though. We had something called a 'candidate forum' where all the candidates presented their answers to previously presented questions and also responded to screened audience questions. This was handled kind of oddly- people were urged very strongly to attend, but only 3 of the current board members attended and one of them left before the presentation actually started. It's this kind of thing that has made this election such a big deal to so many in the school's community.

The ballots are going to be counted early next week. I'll keep you posted.

Monday, May 16, 2005

It's like after a loss...

of someone you cared about. Maybe you hang on to their things for a while. Not necessarily because you believe or even hope they'll come back, but because maybe...

I don't mean to get all wimpy about taking some stuff off a blogroll, but it took me a while to do it because at least in one case I was just hoping, ya know?

There are a few still on there where it really would be like a death for me if they stopped blogging.

No pressure.

Friday, May 13, 2005

No Motive Found.

True crime stories and poetry. Two other things that I love to read. (Check my bookshelves next time you're at my shop, er, house.)
Sometimes, in unexpected places, you find both.

"All of the victims were shot in their heads.
All but McGowan were shot in their beds."

This post.

...this post that I choose this week from American Digest; a satisfying, nourishing read for me because this week has been so crazy busy that I haven't had the opportunity to nourish myself that way.

I like to "nourish" myself sometimes with true crime, relived in the hands of a capable and vivid writer. What am I looking for? Madness? Maybe. I think that I am looking for that line. That thin red line that separates us from madness. Perhaps so I can recognize it when I approach it in myself.

And poetry. Vanderleun termed the lines above "found poetry." I have a few lines here and there, not my own, but belonging to someone with that gift, that I have taken to illustrate some of my life's things.

Often, when I recall my son before his condition overtook him, these lines are on my mind:

"Farewell thou child of my right hand and joy,
My sin was too much hope of thee, loved boy."
Ben Johnson

Thursday, May 05, 2005

I have figured a few things out.

Actually, it's probably only one thing but it works for me.

I included a link in my last post that my initial sidetrack led me to fail to explain. I won't explain it much now either- that will come though, likely in my next post.

That link, however has led me to finally define what attracts me to a specific blog & now allows me to solve my own blogroll etiquette issues.

A good story. I like a good story. I love to read, always have & if I could live anywhere it would be in the small apartment above my own tidy little used-book store that specializes in extremely well written fiction, rich tales of adventure & woe, fact-based historic accounts and carefully chosen nonfiction.

That said, I now know how to clean up my blogroll. Chris tells an excellent story- I laugh out loud, I can see the setting, the characters are rich. He graciously provides us with links to explain unfamiliar terms. My vocabulary has increased- I'm able to make fun of people & situations & they don't understand what I said.

Rob, the author of the unexplained link, is a gifted storyteller. Take some time to read his discontinued blog (there's a link to his current site). I was only able to get through two stories/posts in my initial reading. They were not too long, they were just that full, moving & engaging.

Italian American Princess tells a nice story as well. Mostly auto-biographical, but concise, not cloying. She doesn't vie for sympathy or wrench feelings out of her readers. She just tells her tale. Her self-described snarkiness is a refreshing change of pace from the happy-crappy stuff I've found in so many other women's blogs. (One of the reasons I miss Veruka).

Logic Monkey is a good reporter & offers a lot of fuel for thought to his readers. He unabashedly shares his opinions on weighty subjects, but is also well able to explain them & provide the background to do so.

Make me think, send me someplace I've never been, let me peer over your shoulder. Let me feel what you felt, or if that is too close, let me appreciate what you did & know what you experienced.
I love a good story.